If you leave an hour before you need to be somewhere, it will take 30 minutes to get there. If you leave 30 minutes before, it will take an hour … no matter when you leave.
The hot women outnumber the hot men by at least 2 to 1. The inverse is true for smarts. Thanks, [...]

“I can’t believe I’m doing this.”
I rarely act without considering my actions, and I don’t dabble in regret.
“Are there any nice guys left?”
I’m sure there are tons of you left … somebody’s got to marry all those girls who wear sweater sets, right? But, frankly, I don’t want you. Nice lacks imagination and conviction. Kind? [...]

people who brag about having a big brain and yet misspell summa (hint: if spellcheck is beyond your grasp, sweet pea, check that diploma of yours … *disbelieving snicker*)
people who wear pashminas wrapped tightly around their necks when it’s 70+ degrees out (I’m not naming no names, but, ya know … Eurotrash)
people who yak (yes, [...]