It’s not often that I get title remorse, but today it hit me that “Cocksucker. One word or two?” would have been the *perfect* title for my post last Wednesday. Since no one can turn back the hands of time—not even I—I’m saving this gem of a post title from obscurity by using it today, [...]

To explain why his current existential crisis is such a … well … crisis, my friend says:
This isn’t me. I’m not one to think about things or be introspective. I’ve never been this way. I just live my life.
You don’t get it. You’ve always been fucked up.
Oh, yeaaaahhhhh.

[10:15] Kiki: wtf is wrong with me?
[10:15] Em Em: you’re just too charming!
[10:15] Kiki: shah
[10:15] Kiki: that’s it
[10:15] Kiki: i’m a retard with a too large vocabulary
[10:16] Em Em: my favorite kind of retard!
[10:16] Kiki: i fool even myself into thinking i’m not a retard
[10:16] Em Em: that’s what makes you cute
[10:16] Kiki: hee
[10:16] Kiki: [...]