Okay, I made a promise, and a promise is a promise. Week one of the “just me” spin-free zone.

• Sadly, the first banal thing that I had planned to mention about myself has fallen through at the last moment. See, I was going to regale you with the story of one of my most proud accomplishments of 2008, so far: training my dogs to use Wee-Wee Pads in the house … they’re old girls, long story. Anyway, when I tried to NOT line the entire kitchen with said Wee-Wee Pads, Molly decided it necessary to pee right along the margins of the pads, so as to best allow the urine to seep underneath them all and cover a very large area.
• It is Friday night and:
  • I opted to stay home and catch up on my RSS feeds rather than getting a drink with friends or, ya know, going out with one of the hapless fuckers who thinks he wants to date me.
  • It’s 8:52, and as soon as I hit Publish, I am off to bed.
• This morning as I drove to work, I had an entire imaginary conversation with my imaginary husband in which I tried to dissuade him from towing our imaginary child around the unsafe streets of Boston in one of those bike baby trailers. Oh, don’t worry. It was all in my head … I barely moved my lips at all.

I think that might be about all the me any mere mortal can—or should try to—handle at once. Until next week … it’s Kiki, bitch.