Okay, okay. I haven’t got my poll working just yet. Humbly beg indulgence, etc., as I’ve been sick as all get out for almost three weeks now. Thank you to everyone who sent best wishes for a speedy recovery/flowers/donations in my name to the Self-Righteous Prig Association. Well, I’ve got no fans, so clearly that’s a lie. It would have been cool, though … the flowers, I mean. I like flowers.

Anyhoo, back to the point of this post. A friend recently sent me links to several online diagnostic tools, which proclaim to measure a person’s relative nerd quotient. I accepted … nay, I embraced the challenge of once and for all bringing my nerdiness to light. Unflinchingly, I answered question after question on the first test, feeling pretty confident that my results would be sufficiently nerdy to, ya know, make my parents proud and yet not so nerdy as to lend credence to the kids in school who mocked my eagerness to be chosen for math relay. Yeah, like so many a fond wish … Well, here’s how it shook out:

 

I really need to look into the methodology of a test that puts me in the 90th percentile of nerds. I mean, am I nerdier than 90% of all theoretical people? Am I nerdier than 90% of the people who’ve taken the test? Am I nerdier than 90% of the people who lived on the author’s floor freshman year at UNLV? I need to know these things before I can adequately adjust my worldview. My gut tells me the test is moderately well thought out. It does include a question that explores a person’s motives in taking the test, which seems a rather concise way to cut to the proverbial chase. I don’t think I have the strength to take the other tests. Not tonight anyway. I will let you know how things fare for me and my fragile self-image in a future post.